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by aishahiwatari



Series: Trektober 2020 [2]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Love Confessions, M/M, Porn with Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:48:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26769028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aishahiwatari/pseuds/aishahiwatari
Summary: They haven't been doing- this, the whole time. No, the sex is a recent development, the result of a mutual agreement that neither of them have any better options, or any time to pursue any that might occur. And then they were so incredibly good together, all heat and sparks and uncomplicated comfort that they just sank willingly into something that’s become so much more.Now, Jim can’t imagine doing this with anyone else.(For Trektober 2020, Day 2. Prompt: First Time)
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy
Series: Trektober 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947208
Comments: 18
Kudos: 146
Collections: Trektober 2020





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Jim's overwhelmed, drowning in sensation, unable to feel fear for the loss of his higher senses with Bones warm and solid and so close.

"You're okay, darlin'. Just trust me," is purred in his ear, soothing and heated, Bones' body pressing Jim's into the sheets of his bed, the comforting weight of him bringing their chests so tightly together it feels like his heart is beating double-time.

He's never been further from panic. Everything feels impossibly good; his cock hot and hard and sandwiched between them, wrapped in friction; his legs spread with strong, steady hands around his thighs; Bones' teeth grazing his jaw, followed by kisses. He's so fucking sweet. For someone who curses up a storm both at and about Jim almost constantly, he's surprisingly effusive with his affectionate murmurs and praise.

It's not an unpleasant surprise, by any means. It's lovely, and if Jim hadn't been through so much, hadn't had years to come to terms with the fact that no matter what he does, Bones is going nowhere, he might not have trusted it.

They haven't been doing- this, the whole time. No, the sex is a recent development, the result of a mutual agreement that neither of them have any better options, or any time to pursue any that might occur. And then they were so incredibly good together, all heat and sparks and uncomplicated comfort that they just sank willingly into something that’s become so much more.

Now, Jim can’t imagine doing this with anyone else. He doesn’t want to. He just wants to stay here, wrapped around Bones, with skilled fingers working him open with a firm gentleness like nothing he’s ever experienced.

He can have the worst kind of day, face up to unfamiliar aliens, the unimpressed Admiralty and his own personal demons, take on the burdens of his entire crew, so far from home-

But one kiss from Bones and it’s like it all melts away.

He eases in, cracks Jim open and slides inside, all while murmuring soft praise, telling him he’s beautiful, his hands roaming over every inch of Jim’s skin that he can reach, every brush of his lips warm and worshipful. Jim shudders with how much of everything there is, doesn’t dare mar this gentle connection with the scratch of his nails but clings tighter to the shapely curve of Bones’ shoulders-

And then he says, without thinking, just being and feeling and all of it just too much to put into familiar words- “God, I love you.”

Bones’ hips stutter. And he’s far more composed than Jim, who’s ready to panic and bolt because he can’t remember saying those words before, not ever. He steadies himself and he cradles Jim’s face and he pushes a little deeper so that Jim’s breath catches and his eyes go wide, all his thoughts consumed by Bones and what he does to him.

“I know, Jim. I’ve always known. Thank you for telling me.”

Jim sobs, his eyes squeezed shut but his spine still arching in pleasure, in the need to be close.

"Do you want me to stop?" Bones asks, and it must be a huge effort for him to offer because his cock feels bigger, harder than ever, buried deeper. Even through the blur of tears, Jim can see his eyes are dark and pleading, locked on Jim's-

He likes this, Jim realises then. He had suspected, but never known, but Bones wants it all, friendship and affection and sex and- love.

This man deserves everything and for the first time Jim feels like he might be able to give it to him.

"Keep going," Jim pants, somewhere in the bombardment of his thoughts, all the sensations Bones wrings from him like his sole purpose is to do so. He's too far gone to be dishonest, and his traitorous voice or something in his heart adds, brokenly, "Say it back?"

The answering laugh that would have sent him running before, so recently, is warm, rumbling, rueful. Bones' eyes shine, and his smile is genuine, no less beautiful for being small, one of the few instances in which Bones expresses his emotion with restraint. He rolls his hips and watches Jim gasp at the impossible stretch, like his feelings crept in there too, keeps an agonising slow, steady rhythm as he looks down at Jim, takes up all his space, and speaks with the same stubborn, heartfelt conviction he always does.

"I love you, Jim. You’re my whole goddamn universe and the stars could be shining bright, raining down, or about to explode and I would still rather see you, darlin’. You keep me safe, you keep me busy, you keep me fucking moving on those days when it feels like nothing else can. You inspire me. I’ve seen you go through so much, learn and grow- but deep down you’re still that same stupidly gorgeous, reckless genius I fell in love with right there on that shuttle.”

Bones can dirty talk like nothing else, but it’s the raw emotion that pushes Jim over the edge, has him coming between them with a sob, clutching Bones closer as he trembles with the force of it, burying his face in Bones’ throat so no more honesty can escape him. He just can’t handle it, not right now.

But for the first time, he knows, when his heart rate returns to normal and his skin is dry of Bones' sweat and they're just laying next to each other or about to kiss or up on the Bridge-

He wants more.


End file.
